My Bridal Dress Brainstorming!

One trait about my personality is that I worry a lot. When I worry I start planning and hence try to get everything done beforehand so that I don’t sit and cry at the end. Another trait is that I am a perfectionist – I will push to the limits to make sure everything is spot on.

That being said – my bridal dress hunt has been a complete nightmare and a confusing trip. Firstly, I have never imagined how I would look like a bride, so my preferences in terms of colors and look and basically the entire freaking thing had gone haywire when I sat down to establish my likes and dislikes.

Shuu … don’t tell anyone but another factor was how bridals are made these days – talk about too much of too muchness. Sigh … sorry but I am the more ‘I want to look decent’ fuss-makers and hence I just could not see myself blending in with what designers are doing these days. I mean come to think of it on one hand there is HSY with a complete modern looking – coocoo going bridal design-wear and then there is Bunto which does not like a plain spot on a dress – she just has to fill it up with something … Anything!

After finally getting my head around it and staring at bridals in my free-time for months, here is what all you guys might want to look for in your bridals – also this may help you when you are discussing details with your designer.

Step # 1

Build up your collection – Oh how the internet is a blessing in disguise for us brides, you get the latest bridal fashion shows here to the historic times and you can wear anything you want on your big day! I made an exclusive folder in my laptop saving just these! Pictures and pictures of brides and their dresses. I noticed that none of them were perfect-perfect, i liked the colour of one and the design of another, the neck line of one and the borders of another. The best thing to do is to find a perfect “Design” for yourself and get the colors altered if you want, when briefing your designer. With the help of designs – designers establish your taste in bridal – your preferences like long shirts, short shirts, flowy lehngha or straight gharara, etc! However, maybe sometimes its ‘Oh I like this but I also like that’ – Here you just send both pictures to the designer and let them work their magic! Try sending them a picture of yourself for them to see whats best for the bride-to-be, especially if you are going to an experienced designer. The route out from here is that you pick your favorite designer, tell them what you like eg, shirt’s length, colors, etc and let them sketch and build from scratch and sit back and wait for your final product; your choice honestly! A pro-designer will keep you in the loop regardless.

Step # 2

A checklist for your designer!

- Style of the dress (Traditional, Modern, Simple, Glittery)

- Flow of the dress

- Borders on the lengha, shirt and dupatta (if required)

- Base color of your bridal dress

- Color of borders (if any)

- Types of embroidery preferred (Eg, zardori, nakhsi, stones, crystals, I am bad at this so hop on to google and type “embroidery types”)

- Minor and Major Details  (Exclusive to every brides wish ie, What is going to make your bridal stand out?)

- Sample visuals

Step # 3

Communication – Honestly, I have gotten in touch with more than one designer – from the pro to the low – everyone !

Its pure luck if you end up in a good designer’s hands but it is also common logic. What I have experienced is that the top pro designers who cost a fortune will accommodate you well anyways. You can either choose something from their existing collection and get it personalized or you can ask them to design a new outfit – everything depends on how much you are willing to spend. So in this step – we’re excluding them since they listen – they HAVE to listen in fact

Considering designers who work with above avg and avg budgets – there is no way to establish a ‘range’ for bridals but okay let’s suppose this can be anywhere between 1 lacs to 4 lacs. These designers can be angels and put in a lot of effort for you or they can totally ruin it for you. Majority of us fall into this category due to our budgets so we have to have to take care – it should always be All about you!

Start off with crystal clear communication – if you are meeting up don’t let your thoughts fly about – jot them down! If you are communicating from abroad (even worse and my scenario!) be very clear in your email. You may want to sit yourself down and shortlist all the things you want your bridal to have too!

Judge the Response: Ladies and Designers, I am very sorry but this is a have to have to scenario. Whatever money we spent has to be justified and this is how we can justify it. We brides have a couple of wishes when it comes to our dresses & whoever is designing it – whether a big shot or someone else needs to respect those wishes. I am not saying they need to follow every word we blurt out but this is what I mean:

See if the designer is replying and/or meeting on given dates and as per schedule. Is he or she a deadlines person and stick to them (One designer would reply to one of my emails and then disappear for weeks? Some don’t even bother to respond … haha and we pay themm?)

How detailed is the designer’s thought-process, is she making everything clear?

If you have questions – is she taking forever to respond or does she or he respond at all?

Is she confident in her descriptions – sometimes the designer is as confused as we are – is she leading you to the right direction? An experienced and easy-to-deal with design will never be afraid of suggesting something or advising you to follow what she says – this confidence is rarely found but a very important aspect of a designer!

If you wish to get a formal/semi formal dress designed by the same designer then you’re in luck – you can always ‘test’ the designer’s delivery dates and their interpretations of your descriptions – Sorry I am being a meanie but again … but why would we go to them in the first place if we don’t get what we want at the end?

I have heard enough real life horror stories about designers and bridal companies so risking my bridal outfit in any way is a no no! One of my own experiences with a designer was absolutely absurd!

Without revealing her name, here is what happened – I placed an order from her own pret-a-porter collection – HER OWN – PRET a PORTER which means off the rack kinda dress! I paid full in advance and you wana know when I got my dress? correction: A SIMPLE DRESS?! 3 months later that too with constant nagging ! that too I thought in the middle she would disappear with my money ! lol God ! and I was planning a bridal with her?! I had learned my lesson then so seriously do not let the designer go off track with your bridal – it means too much for us!

Lastly, rate your communication after a couple of backs and forths – is she or he irritated ? Why ? Its absolutely your right to clarify everything beforehand no matter how many emails it takes you. How descriptive is she/he with her clarifications? Communication tells you ALL about the designer.

Step # 4

Ask for a sample patch and a final illustration. This says it all – no questions asked, samples can easily be provided within the same cost of your bridal outfit – don’t let them cost you extra for this! Additionally, it makes yours and the designers lives both easier in numerous ways!

Step # 5

Suggest changes after you receive a patchwork – don’t be afraid to, if you have gots the time – you have gots the rights! make alterations and again make sure they listen and implement! Ask for another smaller – lesser patchwork if they can facilitate you!

Step # 6

Ask yourself – Is the design worth the money? Sometimes we get so nervous that we let the designer’s confidence go overboard. We consider them the pros of all bridal existence and fail to communicate our sides too – like if she is using a color you despise – tell her !!! You gota wear it not her …

Plus a sincere designer will always give you an outfit worth your money. There is a huge difference between 1 lacs and 4 lacs as well, is your final product justified?

Step # 7

Payment terms. This is simple – do not pay full in advance, pay 50-70% and keep the rest till the end.

Step # 8

If you are abroad, always ask in advance what they are charging for shipping, sometimes weird designers tend to rip you off here as well =/

Step # 9

If your designer is suggesting to increase your budget to include more suggestive kaam on your bridal – be skeptical – its okay to be skeptipcal – but if the desginer is throwing in a clutch or anything else in the deal and recommending the ‘kaam’ for your own good- go woot wooot and go for it. This just tells us that the designer is really into the bridal – its okay for her to bribe you with a matching clutch or something A good designer knows your skepticism and they will go above and beyond to make sure you are on the right path to looking gorgeous on your merry day!

Step # 10

Sooner the better – As soon as year 2012 had hit its place – I started my process cuz I knw its a sensitive one. Dont wait for the last 4 months to place your order – once you have all the details down – pay and pray ! Keep following up and make sure your designer stays in touch!

Phew

Us brides with mission impossibles!